Updates: Client Boy

Sooo I know I had totally written off Client Boy the last time we discussed and that lasted about one week before I buckled and gave him a call to say hello. After that, we began a strange pattern of seeing each other about once a week.

Now, before you go judging me, let me explain myself.

Client Boy is a (not so) rare breed of male that grew up as an only child mama's boy and has evolved into a totally selfish, semi-sociopathic, kind of grown-up. Thus, he only wanted to see me when it was convenient to him and the most important person in his life would always be himself. He was never malicious and never meant to hurt me in any way; he just couldn't help it because the he always put his needs and feelings first.

The perfect example of this is I found out that the last time Client Boy had a serious girlfriend, he also had an affair with his boss at the time. Now, he never meant to hurt his girlfriend (or the boss who got attached), but in Client Boy's world, his happiness was his number one priority and having both a girlfriend to go home to and a boss to have sex with on the side was precisely what made him happy. And as a result, being a decent human being and sparing the feelings of two females fell by the wayside.

I had been let down by Client Boy over and over again, and I now realized that the only way to deal with him was to have no expectations whatsoever, and then I could never be disappointed. Once I figured all this out, I knew exactly how to handle him. Any plans we made were always going to be subject to his convenience and therefore always tentative on my end. And I had to be prepared to be smothered in affection while I was with him and forgotten when I wasn't.

And why did I put up with this? Because he was a fun guy and I had no problem seeing him once in a while when I had nothing better to do, now that I knew there was absolutely no boyfriend potential there.

In a surprising and somewhat ironic twist, as soon as I had Client Boy figured out and wasn't that interested in him anymore, he of course felt me pulling away, and wanted me around more. He started introducing me to his friends, doing things like kissing me and doing PDAs in front of them (which is kind of a big thing in my world), and then I knew I was in deep when one of his friends said to me, "I like you. You make [Client Boy] really happy and he says you take really good care of him."

As soon as I relayed that advice to my friends, they all laughed uproariously and told me that I had gotten myself a boyfriend. Of course, I knew this was a total lie because the last thing Client Boy would ever want in his life is a relationship, and I am too smart to be that girl anyway. So after that incident, I started to pull away and rejecting Client Boy's invitations to hang out.

Fingers crossed, any day now he'll figure out that I'm not interested any more. Or I can just send him the above e-card.