Worst Proposal Ever

Last night I went to dinner and drinks with HS Boy and had an extremely odd conversation with him. I was recounting my recent dating adventures, and complaining about the crazy guys I have been meeting in the city. At first he was pretty impressed with my exploits and kept calling me a "player" (I really don't like that term, by the way, nor do I think it's indicative of what I am). Then he got kind of upset and launched into the following diatribe. It's not verbatim, but it's about as close as I can get from memory:

"As soon as you're done being a player and messing around with all these poor guys and breaking all their hearts, give me a call. I've been madly in love with you for the past ten years and will marry you the second you're ready. We can go to the store and pick out the ring together so you get exactly what you want, and then I'll get down on one knee, whatever you want. I would marry you right now if you were ready, but I don't think you're anywhere close."

Please remember that until a couple weeks ago, I had not seen this boy for about a decade, not since high school. And I think it's become abundantly clear that he's been carrying a torch for me for quite some time.

Therefore my response went something like this: "Accaaghhla...excuse me?" while choking on chips and salsa.

Yes, before you ask, he was joking (I think), but he was also somewhat serious. I think if I had said yes and really been interested in his proposition, he would've taken me to Tiffany's right there and then.

I was weak in the knees for this guy many years in high school, but now not so much. As is always my luck, my timing seems to be off again and the second I am not interested in them anymore is the second they come calling, or proposing in this particular instance.