I'm Officially a Psycho - Magnet

I learned a few important lessons last night, and I apologize in advance if they are not entirely coherant but I only got about four hours of sleep and my brain is still not completely functioning.

Lesson #1: Shots on a Wednesday night when you have to work on Thursday are a bad, BAD idea.

Lesson #2: My one and only dating consultant m is a chick magnet, when the chicks are fifty (don't ask). As of last night, he's officially fired.

Lesson #3: Don't invite friends of Logan Boy to your birthday party because they will threaten to bring him too.

Lastly, but most importantly,

Lesson #4: There is no end to the egos on some guys. There are some nights (quite often fueled by massive amounts of alcohol) that bring you to the realization that the guys in your life are psychotic and won't leave you alone, and make you question what it is that you are doing to bring such behavior upon yourself.

Case and point: Even when you THINK you were clear about someone (ahem, Slingarm) being an asshole and never wanting to see him again, he might not get it and will drunk text you repeatedly until he gets a response.

Also, when you dump someone over instant messenger and stop seeing them over three months ago (Coworker Boy), for some reason, he still might think that you are harboring these secret feelings for him and proceed to have the following conversation over the course of the night:

Coworker Boy: So really, you're still attracted to me right?
Me: No, not at all.
Coworker Boy: No, you can be honest with me. You totally still like me.
Me: No, really, I don't.
Coworker Boy: C'mon tell the truth. You still want to get with me.
Me: For the last time, if you were the last man on earth, I would rather get sterilized than be with you.

Then he just might text you until 6AM (seriously, 6 in the morning), fishing for an invitation to come over even when you told him that you are seeing someone else and have no interest in him. And even better, you might find out from a mutual friend that he said about you: "Yo I think she really likes me. She totally wants to get on my sack. She's all over my shit yo."

Delusional, much? I'm really thinking these guys need to be put in a room with padded walls and studied.